“Brother Ebuka, my friends and I have decided to kidnap Father Christmas” Chukwuma announced as he barged into his and his brother’s room.
Ebuka stared at him in disbelief for a second, then burst into laughter “Wait, you have decided to do what?”
”Kidnap Father Christmas.” Chukwuma repeated.
“Okay, I hear you, good luck.” Ebuka could not stop laughing.
“Do and finish laughing jor I have important questions to ask you.” Chukwuma said.
“Oya oya ask” Ebuka tried to keep a straight face.
“There are plenty father Christmas abi? How will I now know the real one? Not the fake one oh.”
Ebuka thought for a second then answered. “The real father Christmas is fat, with pot belly, not the one that they put clothe in his stomach oh. His stomach is bigger than daddy’s stomach, then he is fair like a real oyinbo, and he is almost fatter than Aunty Ayo.”
“Where will I find him?”
“The one that they will bring to your school is the real Father Christmas.” Ebuka said, thinking, “If the one they bring to your school is not then it is one of Father Christmas’s assistants, you can still kidnap that one.”
“How do I now make Father Christmas follow me?”
“Hit him on his head really hard.” Ebuka said trying to hold back his laughter. His little brother could not have been serious, he thought. And even if he was serious, how will he kidnap a whole Father Christmas?
Meanwhile, Oyinbo was trying on his Father Christmas costume, in front of a dressing mirror. And practicing his Father Christmas ‘ho ho ho’ chantish laugh.